I’ll Be Your Lighthouse When You Are Lost At Sea

He took his eyes of the spot for just a minute,

and in a twinkling of an eye.

He lost them.

They were nowhere to be found.

The boat drifted,

as the tides became strong.

The blue ocean,

did not reveal traces of their paths.

he panicked.

“What will I tell their wives? I lost them?”

He panicked again.

” Lord, I just took my eyes of the bubble for a minute,

and I lost them.”

Without hesitation, he sailed ashore.

A flotilla of boats set out in the deep blue to look for the two fishermen.

None was found.

As time flew past,

night was quickly approaching.

The sob of a fisherman filled the quiet atmosphere,

as a wife sat there praying for her husband to come home.

The blank stares of a daughter, as she thought about her last words to her father.

The distant look of his sons as they tried to comfort each other.

And the stars sweetly shining, in the still of the night,

as the Savior was whispering ” Be still, and know.”

There was a light, that brightened up the heavens.

And a calmness, that rested upon the waters.

And a wife, and mother trying not to weep for their lost husband and, son.

Then there was the numerous phone calls, that jumped us.

As the morning sun rose, fear tried to creep in.

A father lost at sea,

What could be more nerve wrecking?

Fear was creeping in, but that still voice said

” Throw off your fear and run to me.”

And it was at the mid-day hour,

When the phone rung, at the bay filled with loved ones,

A short man started to jump and shout praises unto God.

A mother, quietly thanking God for his saving Grace.

A wife, with uncontrollable tears, pouring out her heart to God,

For saving her other half;

And a son, who ran to touch his father’s pale skin.

” I’ll be your lighthouse when you are lost at sea.”

The saving Grace of God was evident.

He saved two lost souls at sea.

The only survival tools they had were prayers,

and a merciful Shepherd who hears the prayers of  lost sheep.

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The Ex Culture

Check Yourself

“The day I broke up with my boyfriend, that was the day our friendship ended. We were so close, like two peas in a pod. To tell you the truth, I never focused on my other friends, because I wanted our relationship to be a committed one. But you see, after we broke up, that was it! Friendship ended! I threw  tantrum on my Facebook and twitter page. I went Madea on him. But when I got over him, i realized how stupid I looked. We don’t even talk now, and that don’t bother me as much as it did a few years ago. ” Anonymous.

Unfortunate experience though! For the past three weeks, I was trying to understand why exes are no longer friends. I know, this is strange, but I wanted to do some research on this issue, to have a clearer understanding of why.

One of the main responses I got from individuals was ‘Hurt’. Obviously, we are indeed human beings who portrays a high level of emotions ( yes! men are emotional too, but not as much as females!) that can lead us to a state of emotional hurt when the people we once loved are no longer apart of our lives.

Lack of maturity and Emotional Stability’.

Now, after a break up, some individuals become so petty, it’s not even funny. Some may try to diminish one’s character by spreading lies about one partner, while another individual may have 100% hatred towards their ex partner for whatever reasons ( cheating, change of perspective towards the relationship, partner neglected them, the list can go on).

Probably the relationship ended on a bad note, and some sort of revenge may be an outlet to relieve pain. However, the two examples stated may come across as immature to some individual, and I can personally say they are callow to me. However, I have done my share of premature behavior after a breakup.

So here is an example ( it’s not that dramatic but I am sure you will understand lol!)

So, I broke up with a guy  because he wanted two things: a flock of chicks ( I was the ‘ main chick’ ) and sex, and I was not having it . Who this guy think he was? I had and still have standards, and a reputation to uphold!

Well, partner decided he will tell people I left him for some other guy, and all that jazz. I was baffled by such rumors, I started to call the guy a ‘wench’ ( look up the word if you don’t know what it means) but that was not the Christian thing to do! Nonetheless, I somewhat painted a negative picture of him to so many people, it started to affect him, and I felt guilty about it. But! Thank God for His grace and mercies, I realized that name calling and public shaming would not get me anywhere. I was hurting, and I did not know how to deal with break-ups, cheating, or dishonesty on all sorts of levels. But I learned to let go and move on with my life. And by the way, I needed time to understand my worth, and purpose.

Now, Social media has thought me a lot about the ‘ Ex Culture’. I have come across a few memes like:

ex-girlfriend-meme-7

ex-girlfriend-meme-12

Savage right? Some individuals post the meanest things on Social media, with the intention to create hurt, but the only person they are hurting is themself.

Emotional stability is one thing that we should all strive for. Once we are at the place where we can deal with a change of environment without an outburst of negative emotions, then we can handle disappointments differently.

As Luke 6: 45 states,

“A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.

If anger or lack of trust are embedded in our hearts, then our actions will be based on those two issues when difficult situations arise. As humans, we respond based on how we feel, and that can cause some permanent damage to individuals, even the person doing the damage. Unless, we learn how to control our emotions, then we can become effective problem solvers, and experts at controlling our emotions.

N.B. I am not saying that emotional stability is as easy as ABC, but the process of getting to that place is worth  it.

Maturity plays a major role when entering a relationship.

“I am convinced that most people do not grow up…We marry and dare to have children and call that growing up. I think what we do is mostly grow old. We carry accumulation of years in our bodies, and on our faces, but generally our real selves, the children inside, are innocent and shy as magnolias.”  ( Maya Angelo 2008)

For some of us, we go through adulthood before we become adults. molestation, abuse, neglect, rejection, has been the story of some people’s lives. Therefore, they carry the baggage of their past into a relationship, and upon disappointment they become immune to pain, so they never heal. So, every relationship adds more baggage, and that is unhealthy to that individuals well-being.

I personally, believe that perspective couples should seek  counseling from a trusted counselor, or mentor when getting into a relationship, especially those who are victims of sexual abuse, assaults, and rejection just to name a few.

However, where breakups are concerned, some friendships may dissolve, but that does not give individuals the liberty to tarnish one’s reputation over something that was not meant to be. If feelings are still lingering, then it is best you avoid that person until you are comfortable with communicating with them.

Moving on is hard! Let us admit that! MOVING ON IS HARD! But lashing out at someone because you are hurting can lead to self destruction…….And we do not want that! No! No! No!

Check Yourself

Some of us do not take the time to understand ourselves: We do not have the slightest idea of our weaknesses, strengths, and values.

How can we understand others when we do not understand ourself?

There is a place of discomfort that resonates with pain, hurt, and lack of self worth, so we jump into relationships without dealing with our issues, and that is emotional suicide, it is not sad!

Deal with your issues, before you deal with other people’s issues. It makes life so much easier! Sorry telling Jesus your problems makes life so much better! ( I just had to throw that in there, and I am not forcing anyone to do so.)

Maturity comes with a great understand of who you are, and the way you deal with situations and people. It is important to grow fully, than to grow prematurely. Allow your relationship with yourself to bloom, but most importantly knowing who you are in Christ plays a major role in building character and maturity.

 

What is you motive when going into a relationship?

We all have motives! Some are good and some are bad!

Some relationships are based on:

  • Sex
  • Comfort
  • The need for acceptance
  • Peer Pressure
  • Benefits

While some are based on healthy characteristics:

  • God’s Love ( Christ sending His son Jesus to die for the World)
  • Trust
  • Honesty
  • Marriage as an end goal
  • Both individuals ability to understand each other
  • Commitment
  • Responsibility
  • Healthy Lifestyle and attitudes.

Once a clear motive is established, parties can decided if the relationship is healthy or not.

YOU DECIDE…….

Not everything we cross paths with is permanent. Jobs, friends, relationships, money (lol), fame….. these things may be temporary in our lives, but at some point we need to remember there is a lesson or a blessing in our pain. And most importantly, God’s plan is the best plan, and we ought to be ready for the things that are meant to be in our lives….. that includes that Kingdom man or Woman ( One woman to one man, and vice versa, just making that clear).

So, when it comes to the ‘Ex Culture’, do not drown yourself in an ocean of revenge, but accept that the relationship is no more, and move on without casting stones. If you guys remain friends ( not frenemies) then Bless y’all souls, it not then such is life, and thank God for life!

 

AfroRay

December, 11th 2017.

 

It’s a Struggle!

With palms facing the heavens,

I cried out ” Why?”

Every time I put my hands on something,

I have to struggle before I can access it!

Why everytime I feel relieved,

another blow hit my body?

WHY?

Is my purpose on earth to struggle?

I smile when people are watching,

but behind closed doors,

I lift up my struggle to the hills,

while drowning in my ocean of tears.

Wondering if I’ll ever make it ashore.

Wondering if I will ever feel the Glory,

wondering if I will ever experience the Glory!

They say ” test and trials bring patience,

but sometimes, I am left broken.

Broken!

Can’t afford to open my mouth to utter any words,

but the words are registered in my heart.

Why?

Is my purpose to struggle?

If so, then Lord give me the strength,

because my body is tired!

11146331_10205461985741805_8584616082139860886_o

 

 

 

The Skin Dilemma…

Beautiful skin.

Dark, melanin,

dripping from the rim of her lips unto her toes.

Self- confidence at its peak,

Skin appreciation at its peak,

until, her skin starts to break loose.

Rashes, scabs, heats, and acne,

becomes her plague.

Does she embrace her skin,

or does she hides the abnormal state that presents itself for a time?

IMG_6603

 

The Coffee Shop Effect!

I wanted to look studious,

so I went to the coffee shop.

Laptop seated patiently at the table top,

as I opened my journal to doodle my ideas.

I looked around the room and saw potential novelists,

writers, journalist, and academic enthusiasts

working diligently towards meeting their goals.

I don’t drink coffee,

but I just wanted to experience the coffee shop effect.

The imagery of novels published

because someone got a superb idea while sitting at the coffee shop.

The imagery of projects

coming to fruition because someone decided to spend their free time buying lattes,

but ended up creating new ideas.

So, I decided to visit the coffee shop,

to establish new thoughts,

to create new horizons.

To get that coffee shop effect.

Have you ever experienced that coffee shop effect?

 

working hard

 

 

Stifled Emotions

I loved him,

but I did not know how to say it.

So I silently stifled the words,

and buried those feelings in the crest of my heart.

I knew I loved him,

but I didn’t know how to tell him.

Bim photoshoot_001

Whose Interest?

They say they have your best interest at heart,

but yet they hurt you.

They use your past to haunt you.

Every wound you ever exposed to them,

they find ways to reopen.

Have you ever been in a strange place?

A place that is not home.

A place where friends are 45 minutes away via aeroplane.

A place where you have to start all over again.

And in starting all over again you are left alone.

Trying your very best to make new friends,

but your new friends, are not friends but fender

benders that needs tending.

Silently, you ask yourself,

What on earth am I doing here?

Every corner you turn pain hits you

where wounds were never cured,

and you bleed bitterness, anger, frustration,

then you wonder,

‘ will it ever end?’

One day you have relationship issues,

and the next day you are overdosed with being misused-

by friends,  families, and random well-wishers.

But in the raucous; the chaos, you heard a still voice,

” they are not your friends!’

and you wonder what is that still voice talking about!

But the truth is, you ain’t really wondering,

’cause you know!

The very same thing you been asking God to clarify,

he brought before your very eyes!

” They are not your friends.”

Suddenly, the reality of being a spare tire hits you.

” You were never called to be a spare tire!’

Stored up in the back for emergencies.

Called upon whenever they need you.

You know those type of ‘friends’ that only know your friendship exists when they need a favour.

And nothing ain’t wrong with favours,

but where value is considered,

you are more than just a favour!

You are a daughter or a son of the Most High God.

You were called because God needed you at that time and that place.

And though it does not feel that way,

every pain and every hurt you face were never meant to stay.

Every disappointment springs forth divine appointment.

And divine appointments are ordained by God.

So even though they try to hurt and misuse you,

remember you are a child of God.

And the only one that has your best interest is Jesus Christ.

 

 

 

 

It’s All About My Frustration

IMG-20160121-WA0013

 

 

Oh, what a catastrophe I create!

When I Desire to do things that please me.

Not knowing it will bring some happiness,

Then tragedy.

And the people around you whisper sweet nothings,

About your little shenanigans.

Sweet little Christian Child,

mix up in street lullabies. 

You see yourself wanting to break free from these hypocrites in society:

their stares and negativity.

But the rebel inside of you want to clap back with the words

“I HATE YOU!”

 

Sometimes you feel distorted from your dreams 

You feel the need to scream,

and just blank out everything or persons in front of you 

Frustration kicks in, Stress exhales from your mouth.

Steam through your skin,

And right about now you not liking the skin you’re in 

 

You blow like a horn and puff like the smoke from a cigar.

Frustration just keeps going on and on,

You try to laugh,

But then the tears cascades down your cheeks.

The sound of exhaustion,

=Glides down your chest.

 

 Take it to the Lord in prayer  they say!

But you just continue to rant until your heart is too tired to rant anymore. 

So you are left in despair.

Take it to the Lord in Prayer!

So you…decided to put prayer on pause and fear on play ,

And worst yet you plan to have another frustrating day.

 

 You harbor negative feelings .

Turning your heart to stone…

Wax cold monuments that replicates pain..

Stored up in your bones.

And… you are stuck, between these dry bones,

that are about to crack,

if the enemy hits you too hard-

you’re afraid of not being able to bounce back.

So you breathe…..

And you breathe again…

And you breathe again…

And then screamed ” I need my that peacefulness”

This unforgiveness, is rupturing my soul.

 

With knees bent, and arms surrendered,

the heart that was once stone turned into flesh,

And that emptiness, began to fade,

and a soothe feeling began to cascade gush through  your veins,

Yes!

The frustration has left,

but you know it is not a permanent thing,

So you decided to put your trust in the King of Kings.

With heart wide open,

you accepted His heart, and from that day,

His Love never depart.

 

Afroray@ 2011

 

 

 

 

 

TICK TOCK

Tick tock, the clock is ticking

My ears are itching,

I am a bit uneasy

And I am ready to keep my mind busy.

Can’t wait to get home,

To watch ‘Game of Thrones’

Or probably put on the pS4

And pass my highest score in Fallout 4

Tick tock, the clock is sticking

And my eyes are twitching.

Don’t really understand

What the preacher is saying

Because my mind so busy

Daydreaming about Anime and Dragonball Z

Man, I need to take it easy because

I am starting to cold sweat on this bench.

Tick tock, the clock is stuck

Looks like I am out of luck

And I need to pay attention to the preacher.

Trusting this message will be deep like the Atlantic Ocean,

Hoping my eye lids won’t start bating and my fake lashes bowing

Along with my neck

And my mouth starts yawning.

“A little sleep, A little slumber” the Pastor shouted.

As he proceeded with his message

“The Church is sleeping”

Young people are falling short

Because the older generation is sleeping!

“The Scripture reading for today’s session is taken from Revelation 3:1-3

“1 And unto the angel of the church in Sardis write; These things saith he that hath the seven Spirits of God, and the seven stars; I know thy works, that thou hast a name that thou livest, and art dead.

2 Be watchful, and strengthen the things which remain, that are ready to die: for I have not found thy works perfect before God.

3 Remember therefore how thou hast received and heard, and hold fast, and repent. If therefore thou shalt not watch, I will come on thee as a thief, and thou shalt not know what hour I will come upon thee.”

Tick Tock, Jesus is coming

And no one knows the hour nor the day,

So what are we really doing?

Fighting down each other?

Mother against daughters, Fathers against sons!

Congregations bad talking each other and the pastor….

Big Disaster!

Politics becoming poli-tricks

And the church is embracing political incorrectness!

What a mess!

Jesus is coming and our country is straying!

Referendums are changing

And Christian agendas are delaying

To give the world ways to change our perspectives!

Many of us have rejected the word of God

And succumbing to Black Christianity and debates about the color of our Savior’s skin

And the lost Israelite’s,

When we should be delighting ourselves in the word of God.

The Church is sleeping

And this social construct call race is taking over our pulpits!

They say we Christians are slaves to the white man

Who brained washed us into Christianity!

They call us fools

But Jesus calls us Sons and Daughters

Because we were inoculated with his DNA!

But, how can we say we say we are ready when

We are too busy doing the wrong things!

When we get tied up doing the wrong things!

When we say the wrong things!

And when we accidentally touch the wrong things!

Tick Tock, the clock is ticking

And we need to get it Right!

We need to stop entertaining the world

And start delighting ourselves and Ministering to the World!

We need to love our neighbors as we love ourselves!

Wait!!! We need to understand God’s love to know love,

So we can show love in the Right way!

We need to be like the woman with the issue of blood

And touch the hem of his garments and not doubt the hands of God!

For when we doubt the hands of God, we create problems!

Problems that tears the Church apart!

We need to revive dry bones and kill dirty habits!

So let us start with the older folk!

The supposedly praying Grandmothers, Grandfathers, parents and pastors!

The youth are in trouble!

We need to bring them home!

The Oppressed!

The Neglected ones!

The Homosexuals!

The confused ones!

The ones with no visions

The one’s who faced molestation!

The fornicators!

The Angry ones!

The Broken ones!

Each and every one!

Because the clock is ticking

And we need a Joshua generation!

We need some Gideons!

Some Ruths and Esthers!

But most importantly we need the Comforter,

To be comforted when persecutions arises.

We need to doubt our doubts and put to Not our stingy and feel we better than everybody mentality!

We need to put our trust in God, the God who brought the children of Israel out of Egypt….. Some of us need to leave Egypt and enter his promise land!

Tick, Tock, the clock is ticking,

And the pastor has finished his sermon,

The musicians start playing when the music fades…

So ask yourselves, what happens when the music fades and all is stripped away? What happens when the clock stops ticking?

Will you still be sleeping?

clock

Written by: Renee (Afroray) Plenty

Member of the Writers Association of Grenada & Poet Out (Barbados)

Written in July 2016

Heart Song

I want to write to you like I have never written before.

I want to sing to you, with a voice of love.

I want to enter into your Courts with Praise.

I just want to worship you all my days.

But I have questions that seem to break my focus.